moody

thanks for all the concerns from everyone!!i really appreciate it.. =) i think i will slow down blogging as i will be starting my new job on monday.it's a ALL time busy job ,ain't easy to be a tour officer.
moreover,im still in a sad mood... ='( hope it will go away soon.got to get used to it! im too sad to blog. take care ppl! i will be back when i get my 'mood' back *wink*

found 2 old pics..

fren's birthday..the one in the middle

not even you

U left me at home crying yet u didnt even care. hurtful words have been let out but yet u didnt even care. smses were sent out but yet u didnt even care and went to bed.
How can anyone go to sleep so peacefully without feeling any sadness?i dunno but myself..

i cried and cried but no one knows ..no one cares..
left alone in this corner of my room...

Perhaps i should juz let everything unsaid..

the going gets tougher

Let's talk about journey of life.well,my life is in a mess! sigh..i dont have a happy family back home.My dad is alwiz nuts and he is a real stingy person.moreover,he usually gets on our nerves.not usually but almost everyday.that really irritates me alot and i chose not to stay at home.
I grew up with my grandparents in Kampar and i really enjoyed my childhood life until i moved back with my parents.In the beggining,everything went well and we still have laughter and some fun back home.this ended few years back when i and my dad had a big fight and eventually,we din talk to each other until this very day.OH well,nvm that..that doesnt matters to me now.
My mom on the other hand is a very active women and a very ambitious women.She always have her plan for future and i hope someday one of her plan DO work out!(coz towards the end,her plan alwiz din work out) *tee hee hee*
i have a very low self esteem myself.i think im not good enough.i cannot compare to other ppl who are smart and have highly education qualifications.what i have?juz a diploma on international air transport and can only lead tour.nothing to be proud of at all.i dont even dare to let anyone know what sort of qualifications i have.im so shy to tell out.not even confident or happy with wat im having now.it's not that i dont want to study or being foolish on laziness..i juz dont have the chance to.THANKS to that evil grandmother(father side) saying tat gals don need to study so much and tat i will waste my father's money.WHAT THE HELL! hate all of them.doesnt make any SENSE!! May God bless them!(feel the sarcasm)

Now,my mom wants to migrate to US next year.i do not know whether this time will it be real or it's juz another fantasy or HOPE of her own.she asked me to plan and decide whether i want to follow her or roam this world by myself.i alwiz have those freedom.i am lucky to have those freedom to do anything i want or go anywhere i want or be anywhere i want to be.Is this an advantage or disadvantage??Sometimes,i juz wan to be a little girl where mummy decides everything for me,dont have to worry or stress on decisions that i have to make.anyway, we will see how things gonna be later and currently im busy preparing documents to apply for US visa.wish me luck for the interview. by the way..this is suppose to be a secret..none of our family members know about this.Dont let the cat out of the bag!!
Which part of US will i be?would it be MIAMI FLORIDA??Will this succeed anyway?Only God knows... =)

Have a nice day ppl...

appreciate it

i am so lucky to have u by my side tonight.i really appreciate it.u went to the cinema juz to get tickets for movie and Rush back to my hse to pick me up.then, rush back to the cinema to catch the movie.i was really down and feeling moody tonight but i felt better now.Thanks!! i do not know what more can i say or do to let u know how grateful i am to have u tonight...

finally i found something i like - WoRkInG

MATTA fair has juz started today and i was helping out in the tour department.the blardy phone rang NON STOP! geez! i thought it would be better staying in the office rather than in PWTC.i was totally wrong! sweat...the file for the fare list and package list was so thick! i did not attend the briefing and i was so blur..0 knowledge on those products.Fortunately,i managed to handle all the customers. =) Instead,i really enjoy my work today.planning tours for couples,groups and old ppl.this is the first time im having this feeling of joy + satisfaction at work.the time flies damn fast today.perhaps i really enjoyed my work today.
Good news! im being offered a job in tour department and will be starting my new and so called dream job of my own. *wink* my position will be a tour officer (sounds weird) tour consultant sounds better eh? i hope i can get to lead tour ASAP! cant wait to be a tour leader *jumping up and down*

me and my dearie + his cousin went to sky bar in Traders hotel near convention hall.it was amazing! absolutely marvellous ! trust me.i really love the environment over there where i can have a beautiful view from 33rd floor,where i can see the twin tower shinning bright? hehe. A swimming pool was right in the middle of the place.sorry, not for swimming! =P Then,we went to Thai club.LOL.this time i didnt get stop.thank goodness!i was so embarrased once,i was stopped when entering velvet.haha.Back to thai club..there were beautiful womens (pondans) performing POLE dancing.our table was right in front of the pole!!what a great view from the front! hahaha. then there were this chinese "leng lui" being a host of the night.she was adding some fun as there were 3 guys celebrating their birthdays on that day.that "leng lui" asked them to dance with the pole! haha.the guys were kinda cute ..aww... suddenly, she/he came to our table and approach my bf.here are the conversation : (roughly only,cant really rmb)

leng lui : u look so young la,does ur mom know u are here anot?
ws : * laughing* tee-hee-hee
leng lui : u so cute la
ws : (still tee-hee-hee)
leng lui : so are u virgin anot??
ws: dunno
leng lui : where can dunno? yes means yes no means no..OR maybe??
ws: laughing and said MAYBE
leng lui : ha?maybe ar..oh..then muz be went in the wrong hole lor?
ws: *laugh*
leng lui : (went to kacau the 3 guys) and came back after a while... so u still dunno u virgin anot ar?
nvm lah..later u come to the back stage,then i will show u whether u virgin or not.if u are virgin then i can make u not virgin lor..tee hee hee.im virgin too u know..
val : DAMN IT (in the heart)

stayed 1 night in equatorial hotel.THANK U SO MUCH to Dr Low( ws's cousin) and had our breakfast in the hotel before we leave.what a tiring Night! yet,enjoyable =)

THANKS TO CALEB...i got hooked on the song "my wish" aiks!!!!!
lurve this song!

Till then... (lazy to blog these days..tak ada masa leh )